And the Winners Are...

Most of you are aware of the analytics that allow us bloggers to track stuff like where our readers are coming from, how long they're staying and what search engine key words and phrases bring new visitors to our sites. I don't pay too much attention to it but I do get a big kick out of some of the searches that bring people to formerlyfun. So here's a recap of the most popular and odd searches.


And the winners are...
Manzilian
This of course because of my feature on the first man I ever manscaped, boy brazilians getting people pretty pumped up apparently because this one comes up a lot.

Jesus Sweater
Making our Christmas lists maybe?

She just frosted my face like a cake
With this, they landed a story about a laser peel I had, I was talking about them frosting my face with numbing gel, what do you think they were talking about, hmmmm.

Should I ask my boyfriend to wax?
Again with the man waxing.

Traci Lords cosmetic surgery
Traci Lords boobs
Traci Lords all over her face

I've lumped these together, there were a few other variations but too pervy for even me. This search took them to my post on getting gawked at for what I thought was looking good, but turned out to be something else, ugh.

where can I get a neuralizer
This landed them here, I think it's cool that there's at least a few people who think they can buy a neuralizer on the internet, hmmm, try craigslist.

red shoe diary/diaries
Bet they are pretty surprised when this search takes them here, to a video of my bebe clomping around in her red Mary Janes.

shake your ass baby
Again, imagine their surprise when it's my 1 year old shaking her booty.

babies making out
Who's searching for this? Here's the real deal.


And the runners up...
birkin marie antoinette
This one is a runner up because type in the word birkin marie antoinette and you get what is still to date, my most controversial post.

how to do the fleet ez-prep
I feel a little bad for this one because someone is looking for directions on doing the pre-colonoscopy EZ-Prep and lands on my image of Fleet Ez Prep photoshopped to look like the devil, I m sure that's comforting.

cat kneading pelvic thrusts is he masturbating
People have questions, I have answers, yes he is.

special olympics doping
Just because they're special doesn't mean they aren't competitive.

young gay swimwear
Lot's of people searching for this one, I think it's a bit of a fetish really.W

baby vampires
With all of the vampire series and books all the rage for now, is it any wonder people are concerned about the influx of baby vampires?

olestra side effects
when your sliding into home and your pants are filled with foam(perhaps related to the Olestra side effects)
This one needs no explanation.


Honorable mention for sheer volume of hits...
beautiful vagina
Why thank you, however, I don't know where this actually took the searcher.

words to describe a mood
I get a ton of this one and it's variants which tells me there are quite a few people who are trying to put words to how they feel.

Italian stereotypes
Is someone trying to find hurtful invectives to cast in someones direction or is someone trying to know at what point to feign insult?

Montel Williams death
I wrote this a long time ago. People ran the original comment a long time ago. Still, people are not sure whether he is alive or dead.

signs a man is gay
Lots of these searches originate in the Middle East and also with file extensions like .catholic.org and .vatican.org, hmmm.

trick-or-treat smell my feet
I'm guessing these searchers were just getting in the spirit of Halloween.

amanda huginkiss
Were they looking for a phone number, a man to kiss, or prank phone call ideas?

Kate Winslet cellulite photos
Schadenfreude, curiosity or a call for real female imagery?

just confusing...
horse made out of signs

confessions of a horny mom

what is in the belly of a giant woman

well aren't you just a ray of fucking sunshine

gross public toilet

smell my feet she said

as busy as a mosquito

Las Vegas phallus god statue

idiom in a crunch

McCain, has anyone seen my dog?

Peppermint bark school

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9 comments:

Dirty Pirate Hooker said... November 5, 2008 at 11:46 AM  

Wow, you get A LOT of good ones. Most of mine involve hookers or beer. My favorite one to date though would have to be, "brother sister sex".

Yeah, there sure are some sick fucks out there!

Formerly Fun said... November 5, 2008 at 11:59 AM  

DPH-
Nice.

Dirty Pirate Hooker said... November 5, 2008 at 1:48 PM  

It's scary what people search for, but even scarier that the search engine found something in our content to match it up!

Duck said... November 5, 2008 at 9:16 PM  

The only one I've gotten was something like 'big penis'. And if you knew me, you know that conversation doesn't come up very often ;)

Baroness von Bloggenschtern said... November 6, 2008 at 8:14 AM  

With great concern, I had to read your "birkin marie antoinette" post to make sure this wasn't one of mine.

But then I realized that my red "Firkin" (fake + birkin = firkin), which I love beyond measure, which looks exactly the same, cost me a whopping $30 at some craptacular boutique in Paris.

And yeah, beyotch, it's Ploc! (pleather + crocodile = ploc)

gnomespeak said... November 6, 2008 at 9:19 AM  

Indeed. What is in the belly of a giant woman? I've always wanted to know.

mongoliangirl said... November 6, 2008 at 8:30 PM  

I'm still going to steal your devil-ized EZ Prep!

Florida Girl In Sydney said... November 6, 2008 at 8:36 PM  

Those are good ones, I just checked mine out-- they are boring as hell-- well except the ones (there are several) that searched "Sydney Girl Sex"

Rassles said... November 7, 2008 at 7:07 AM  

I am obviously an idiot, because I have no idea how to search for these things.

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