He Said, She Said
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
He Said, She Said
Me(wistfully as I watch our two girls frolic in the tub): I wish I had a sister.
Him: I can pretend to be your sister.
Me: It's not the same.
Him: Come on, try me. Tell me something you'd tell your sister if you had one.
Me: Ok, rambling, dissecting, analyzing, feelings, blah, blah, overwhelmed, blah, blah, more feelings.
Him: (using his hands to mime pigtails on the sides of his head) Let's make out.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Do It Yourself
So we had a rare free Saturday without the kids(thank you Grandma) and I had to work until about 2pm. I was running down the husband's honey do list, making sure he knew I wanted some things done around the house.
"Don't sit around all morning lazing about, looking at porn and doing whatever it is you do when I'm gone until you get my list done, I admonished him.
"I'm not going to sit around and masturbate all day", he chided me like he does when I act like he can't get anything done without me directing him.
So I grab my lunch, leave the house and get in the car before I realize I left my cell in the house. His office window is right at the front of the house so he can see me coming back. As I open the front door, he's standing right there, with his pants down, holding our poor beagle up against him.
"We're stuck, honey, uh, can I get a hand here, I'm stuck in the dog."
I was still laughing when I got to work.
Labels: he said, He's all mine., she said
10 comments:
Posts
Really? You're fibbing.
To be clear, he wasn't actually doing anything to the dog. But he did pretend to doink the dog for comic effect, which reminded me why I married him.(Because he makes me laugh not because he pantomimes assaulting the family pet.)
I might have a crush on your husband.
"Let's make out".
You are a lucky, lucky woman.
I think.
Pretty impressive banter going on there.
I tend just to grunt and point at my wife.
OMG I wish my sister w o u l d ma-
wait. I don't wanna make out with my sister.
wait. I feel all awkward inside now.
I think I'm in love with your husband.
Man, I NEVER talk to my sister about stuff. Never. I see all these people sharing things with their sisters and all I can think is, "Who would tell secrets to their sister?"
Because sisters are totally lame.
I would rather have your husband than my sisters.
Okay, maybe not.
Sisters suck. I'd happily trade mine in for a brother.
And thanks for the explanation on the dog thing because, well, I was slightly disturbed.
ah crappola, it's been that long?! Last I checked you guys had cats, now there's a dog? Oye, I really have to set up an appointment to visit now =)