Walk Like a Man

This guy(scroll down to Switcheroo, Jul 7) wrote a pretty interesting piece that got me thinking about what it would feel like to inhabit the body of a man for a day. Not the chemical part of the equation, I'll skip the testosterone and such, just the physical body.

I want to know what it's like to feel less physically vulnerable. As a guy I'd walk through a quiet, deserted, basement parking lot without having my keys in the 'I could stab you in the jugular if I needed to' position. I am 5', ok, probably 4'11 so I would love to feel the physicality of being bigger, taking up more space, I'd like to think I could be rather intimidating. I might even pick a fight to test out the goods, here's where some of that testosterone might be helpful.

I want to know what it's like to wear comfortable, figure-forgiving clothes and shoes made as much for comfort as style. I want to leave the house with minimal grooming totally confident that I'll get a gold star for my shower, shave and good shoes. To enjoy a day without tweezers, volumnizer, concealer, though I might not be able to break my lipgloss habit, ok, I'd switch to a lip balm(less sheen.)

There would definitely be some self-exploration. In fact, I might need an extra day for that. I would get a blowjob so I know why it makes you men do almost anything. I would get laid a lot in those two short days. I'd instill in women a sense of security, choice, and enough bravado and push to keep from becoming "the friend". I would make her feel so gorgeous and enchanting that she'd let me do anything, probably even give me a backdoor pass, yeah I said it. The ladies would be helpless to my charms, how could they not, I'm a woman, I know what works on me and though we are complicated, fundamentally, we're not that different.

But I hope while I'm living my own version of Freaky Friday, I don't get pulled over because without my tattersons front and center, I'd definitely be getting a ticket.

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4 comments:

RiverPoet said... July 23, 2008 at 2:09 PM  

:-) Tattersons?

I know what you mean. It seems, at least from this side, that men get it all. I could definitely go for the figure forgiving clothing. If a woman is Tony Soprano's size, she doesn't get laid - no matter how powerful. I don't get it.

Peace - D

MJ said... July 24, 2008 at 8:41 AM  

And you can think farting and other bodily functions is hilaaaarious, without being embarrassed. You could even tell penis jokes with reckless abandon! : )

formerly fun said... July 24, 2008 at 8:45 AM  

River- Isn't that true. When I first came to Southern California I was a chubby midwestern girl and I was positively ignored. I lost 25# and I couldn't turn them away fast enough. I was the same person, just less of me.

mj-I'll have you know I tell penis jokes with reckless abandon now:)

Theresa in Mèrida said... July 28, 2008 at 5:48 PM  

I am 5'2" tall and now I am TALL! We moved to the Yucatan, where I am as tall as most men, taller than almost all the woman. It's was very weird to go to California to visit my kids and shrink. I love it when I reach over someone to get things off the top shelf. Things here are sized for me! Pretty cool..
regards,
Theresa

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